The Dark Side of Self Improvement

You’re a goal oriented person aren’t you? You’re probably a self improvement master. You’ve got your check off lists, goal maps, and all the right tools to keep you on track towards your dreams. You get up every morning so excited to tackle another day. You are a pumped up machine right? Probably not.

 Let’s face it. It doesn’t matter how good your intentions, sometimes it’s just so damn hard to stay motivated. I mean you’ve watched all the great TED talks and read nothing but motivational classics. So why aren’t you motivated? You’re thinking obviously you’re just too weak and feeble minded. You can’t cut the mustard. You don’t have the right stuff. And, as you’re plagued with the shame and the guilt, you sink into despair. It’s all so confusing. Why can’t you be like so and so?  He’s always pumped. A mudslide could engulf his home and he’d still be focused on his goals as if he didn’t have a care in the world. He is always motivate "and" inspired. Herein lies the problem. You’re trying to rely on self motivation while so and so is being led by inspiration.


A lot of people tend to associate “motivation” with “inspiration” as if these words were one in the same. Actually they are quite different both in definition and, more importantly, application. First we’ll take a look at the root word definitions.

Motivate:  To give someone a reason for doing something or to be a reason for something.

Inspire:   To influence, move, or guide by the divine or supernatural. To breathe or blow into or upon.


  Understand that only motivation can be “applied”. It’s usually accomplished by some kind of prodding and/or conjuring up some inner strength and discipline. You’re being coerced by your emotions. More often than not it’s just a quick fix and the rewards are short lived. Much like a roller coaster it’s just up and then down. Over and over again. This is one reason why most people give up working on a particular goal. You’re always being pushed in one form or another. It usually feels like an obligation of sort. I should do this or I ought to do that and if I don’t I’m just lazy or irresponsible. And that opens the door for more guilt and self-criticism. Yet somehow, after the pity party, you gather enough fortitude and climb right back into the same old hamster wheel. Sound familiar?


 Inspiration on the other hand can’t be applied. Unlike motivation there is no external pressure. The force that drives you comes from inside your inner being. It’s not” I should” or ” I ought”. It’s “I want to. I am compelled by something greater than myself.  Like your own breathing it comes naturally. You don’t think twice about it. Inspiration isn’t shackled by emotions. How you feel at the moment is irrelevant. You just know you have a passion burning inside which gives you a purpose in life. You are driven and the “motivation” comes effortlessly. One of my favorite quotes is from Dr. Wayne Dyer. He said…

“Motivation is when you get hold of an idea and carry it through to its conclusion, and inspiration is when an idea gets hold of you and carries you where you are intended to go.” 


So where does inspiration come from? How do you find it? Well you’ve most likely already found it and it’s still there where it was from the start. Someone or something inspired you at some point in your life and at that instant the torch was handed to you. I believe it never left you. Sure the embers may have died down but the spark is still there. Why? Because it was never about you. I believe that true inspiration is fueled by helping others. Either directly or indirectly your purpose must somehow benefit others and your own well being is simply a byproduct. So what quenched the fire to a slow ember?

 Your head. Pure and simple. Your inspiration was born in your heart and not your brain. Goal maps, productivity apps, to-do lists and the like make it feel like hard work. And it is. If the anticipation and the excitement are gone why even bother. You’re supposed to enjoy the ride right? To rekindle the flame you have to get out of your head. Quit working and trying so damn hard. Overthinking usually leads to procrastination anyway. Just step away from your environment for a while. You’re not going to find inspiration where you are right now.

 Being a writer I have to do this all the time. I have to just back away from my laptop for a period of time. I usually go hiking and take my camera or I go fishing. Get out of the office or your house. More than likely you’ve been neglecting some sort of activity you really loved. Go do that. Have some fun with your family and friends. Get some exercise. It can be anything as long as it gets you out of your head and back to enjoying life. After a period of time you’ll be refreshed and you’ll slowly sense that inspiration drawing you back again. After all, it never left you. You left it.


Remember your inspiration, your passion, and your purpose isn’t only about your dreams but about the hope of others.  Motivation may temporarily help you toward a goal but inspiration guides and empowers you towards your mission.

 Thank you for visiting and leave your comments. I’d love to hear from you. Don’t forget to tweet and share.  Maybe someone you know could use this right now.